Monday, May 25, 2009

Excuses, and Other Things That Only Flow in One Direction

As promised, here are the reasons why I haven't blogged for the last two weeks (with the notable exception of posting Casey's blockbuster performance):

1. As you know, I monitor the flora and fauna on our little slice of Florida pretty closely. This takes a great deal of my time and sometimes gets in the way of blogging. For example, I spied the breathtaking specimen below a week or so ago and managed to get in for a nice, close shot.

I was quite pleased with myself all day after getting this shot -- until I went outside the next morning to water those flowers and found the butterfly in exactly the same spot. It's surprisingly easy to get great nature shots when the nature is dead.

2. Instead of blogging, I've been spending a considerable amount of time getting fishing lines out of trees.

3. I also spent a fair amount of time following Mother's Day trying to decide where to send Casey to art school as he is showing such promise in portraiture these days.

You ought to be able to recognize who that is -- but in case you don't, excuse #4 should help you out. The artist's rendering of the hair in the portrait is so true to life, you might not be able to tell the difference between the photo and the portrait.

4. I gave the devotion at our church's recent Ladies Brunch and I spent several evenings diligently preparing (i.e., freaking out curled up in a fetal position).

5. I've been so busy at work the last couple of weeks I've had to employ my two year old to take care of odd jobs around the office, such as tightening the bolt securing the lampshade to the lamp on my conference table, not to mention the incredibly important task of ensuring an adequate number of tennis shoe prints are on top of the table itself.

6. I've also had to monitor the transformation of my husband from a mildly redneck Mr. Fixit into a bb-gun-toting verminator. That's all I can say about that as any more information might land him in jail, or worse, on his own reality TV show.

7. We have also spent a fair amount of time preparing for the Memorial Day Weekend Worship Arts Team BBQ (which will be the subject of a later blog entry this week). We were hoping to borrow my friend's inflatable waterslide for the event, but when we went to pick it up, my friend had been "storing" it beside a ficus tree for the last six months:

Casey is looking dejected because he had been looking forward to testing out said waterslide as often as possible prior to the BBQ. But the ficus tree had grown rather attached to the waterslide and was not willing to suffer the emotional trauma of letting go.

8. And lastly, my parents were here for about a week and were pretty much left to fend for themselves while I was dealing with excuses 1 through 7 above. However, I took time out from excuses 1 through 7 to watch my parents test out an oft-quoted scientific theory by attempting to empty out their motor home's septic tank when their camper was actually downhill from the pipe.

My father, after having been doused in the contents of the black water tank, is now willing to swear to you that crap really only flows downhill.

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